We have raised our daughter with a method of parenting called
attachment parenting. This frequently denotes the following:
co sleeping
breastfeeding
babywearing
assuming baby cries for a reason
There are other components to the attachment parenting method, but these are the most
frequently practiced ones.
We ended up doing this method of parenting by accident;
it seemed easier to me, as I was recovering from an unwanted C section
and a car accident, and my body and mind needed
rest. It was initially very painful to nurse,
as the car accident had injured my chest. Nonetheless,
I went to a chiropractor and the pain eventually receded.
I wore Kaya because she hated her stroller, but more
frequently I just carried her.
I highly recommend the Attachment parenting method as
it helped me bond to my daughter
and understand her needs.
APing is not just for mom to do, either.
In countries such as India, an entire family lives together,
grandparents, in laws, aunts/uncles, etc
So everyone helps out.
Dad, grandma, etc can wear baby, and should!
Balance is the key
I have seen forums where moms try to battle out who is a better parent,
and who adheres to APing more. I find this sad and therefore
do not participate in many forums.
As Dr Sears says on his What AP is: 7 Baby B’s
‘In your zeal to give so much to your baby, it’s easy to neglect the needs of yourself and your marriage. As you will learn the key to putting balance in your parenting is being appropriately responsive to your baby – knowing when to say “yes” and when to say “no,” and having the wisdom to say “yes” to yourself when you need help.’
I developed both pp depression and pp anxiety, and I firmly believe that
that point number 7 of Dr Sears, Balance, is what I missed out on.
I had a Midwife write an interesting comment on my blog,
on how she saw APing work so well for young kids,
but then noticed many moms going into fear based parenting.
She is right.
We cannot obsess over our kids, or have them on some sort of invisible
leash the rest of their lives.
I now am selfish about getting free time, because it keeps me sane!
I believe there isn’t one way to parent,
their are many.
Every family is unique and therefore
one parenting method may not work
for another.
My brother has 7 kids.
7.
And his wife is a nurse turned stay at home mom.
Their kids go to the same Catholic school I did. I am not a fan of the school, to put it very lightly.
My family and I unschool.
My sister has 3 kids and homeschools them.
I wouldn’t push my way of parenting onto anyone, but instead value
how we are each unique.
This page serves as a reminder of that need for balance in
our family life.
So if you feel
judged by someone or some mean forum member,
I understand how you feel.
Extended Breastfeeding
My daughter is 3.5 and still a nursing fiend!
She is unvaccinated and rarely gets ill.
In comparison to kids where we have lived and currently live,
she is healthier.
We are strict about diet and eat mostly
veg, and I believe that has
greatly contributed. But the bottom line is that breastmilk is a superfood
and indigenous cultures do extended breastfeeding.
Our society views extended breastfeeding as obscene and fails
to recognize that toddlers and such don’t view breasts as
sex objects.
They view them as an extension of mom
that comforts and provides something they live off of.
It is both a form of comfort and nutrition,
not something sexual or unnatural.
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